Friday, April 21, 2017

There's a SNAKE in the lobby!

Yesterday, there was a snake in my office building. In the lobby. On the handicapped ramp. It was itty bitty and terrified, it's little head covered in dust bunnies from skulking (can a snake skulk?) along the baseboards. Eventually, one of our guys carefully put a black wastebasket over it and called TWRA. Eventually, when they showed up, they identified the little guy as a common water snake (someone said it was a copperhead so no one was willing to go near it) and put it gently in a bucket labeled: SNAKES ONLY. Bye-bye little snake. Be free!

OK - I'm not a snake person really, and I probably wouldn't have touched it if you'd paid me, but it was a distraction. And I was clearly distracted because...

...well, let me back up a minute.

Prior to the snake incident, I'd been in my office filing. Truly, of all the activities which make up my job as an administrative assistant, I dislike filing the most. Good thing I love my job, eh? Anyway, having to wear a security badge all day, every day, whenever I'm on site, can get...annoying sometimes. The badge kept getting in my way as I was filing and finally, I'd gotten irritated enough that I yanked it off, tossed it on my desk, and continued filing.

I forgot all about it.

(Do you see where this is going yet?)

Shortly thereafter, our mail carrier poked his nose in my office and said, "There's a snake in the lobby!"

ME: A what, where?

HIM: A snake! In the lobby!

ME: You're joking, right?

HIM: No, Sunshine (that's what he calls me), I'm not joking. There's really a snake in the lobby.

So, of course, what do I do? I go to the lobby to check things out.

Like I said, I'm not much of a snake person, but I got distracted. Lots of people out there gawking at the snake, including my boss, a couple of other manager-types, my predecessor in my current position, among others. Chatter turned to questions about the possibility of other snakes. Where did this one come from? Were there others? Where there's one, there are usually more...right?

I said, "I'm going to step outside and take a quick peek around. If I see any more, I'll let you know," and proceeded to exit the building.

(Aahh! You've figured it out, haven't you?)

As soon as those building doors sealed shut behind me - like that second; that instant - I realized I'd left my security badge on my desk. Inside the building.

I was locked out.


Now what?

Well, initially I considered sheepishly banging on the door of the lobby and asking to be let back in, but, truthfully, my boss was still right there and I have enough pride to not want to look the fool in front of him. So I moved off to the left, ostensibly searching for more snakes, in case anyone should ask, and then I could just sort of follow them back in the building and no one would be the wiser, right?

But no one came out.

Of course, I would lock myself out of the building at a time of day when everyone was back from lunch and already settled into their afternoon work.


Now what?

In a moment of brief brilliance (I don't have those moments often), I remembered: K! I'll go ask K! Her window is on the lower level and accessible to me by a couple of steps through the landscaping. (I watched carefully for snakes.) I rapped a gentle shave-and-a-haircut on the glass and she paused, clearly wondering if she heard what she thought she heard, turned slowly around, saw me, and mouthed, "Where is your badge?" with a wicked grin.

I mouthed back: On my desk!

She mouthed: Ok. I'll come let you in.

After letting me in, she said, "You'd better have a good story for leaving your badge on your desk, you goober!" (or some variation thereof.) After which, I launched the "There's a snake in the lobby!" story.

It was an interesting day.

I love my friends. Thanks again for rescuing me, K!


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