Car Conversations

Boy-child: Mom, what do you want to read to me when we get home?

Me: The Riot Act

Boy-child: What's that?

Me: You'll see!

MWAHAHAHA!!!

TTFN
JMS

Yup...I know the feeling

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Writing in the present, reading about the past

For those of you who don’t know, I tend write these posts a day or two ahead of time.  I love the schedule option afforded to me by Blogger.  For example, as I write this, it is Thursday evening, the twelfth of February, 2015.  I am currently sitting in bed feeling quite pleased with myself at having made a pair of navy blue hand/wrist/arm warmers out of a very well-loved but much too small pair of girl-child’s old tights.  I’m crafty like that.  I just grabbed the pair of super-sharp scissors out of my bedside table drawer and after 6 snips – TA DA! – comfy warm things I can wear while I type.  My fingers are still kinda cold, but I’m toasty warm up to my elbows!  Go me.

Anyway, I just spent the evening with girl-child.  She started out kinda grumpy but pretty soon managed to dig down deep and find her happy.  We took a trip to the Greens of Wal and purchased some super-groovy Valentine’s Day cards for her classmates.  Then, at home, she spent a very happy 30-40 minutes filling out the cards and making a special one for her teacher.  There was even humming involved.  Humming usually means relaxed and content girl-child.  Humming is a good sign.  You don't want to interrupt the humming girl-child or relaxed and content may be in jeopardy.

After that, she and I played a few rounds of 4 Pics 1 Word.  She’s super good at that game and tends to be a lot faster than I am.  Then boy-child came home with Hubby and, though he came and joined us for a few minutes, he sorta broke the moment.  Not that I wasn’t happy to see him – he’s a goober and I adore him – but girl-child and I were doing fine without him and boy-child is nothing if not competitive.  I’m sure you can see the problem.  There began the pushy-shovey-my-turns and I finally had to call the game and kick them both outta the room.  Sheesh!

It took absolutely ages to get everyone in jammies with teeth brushed and tucked in bed with kisses and hugs and dream-lites making blue star patterns on ceilings.  But now that young'uns are settled and I am able to settle a little bit, too – I realize that I am bone tired and my brain is mush.  I am more scattered than usual.  (Probably the reason for this very poorly written, all over the place post.  Sorry.)  

I am very much looking forward to tomorrow night, which is actually Friday, because remember, you're probably reading this on Saturday so tomorrow night as I type is actually last night when you’ll be reading this.

Confused yet?  So am I.

I think I need to go to bed.

TTFN

JMS

Mornings in days of yore

You know how they say never to blog, post on social media, do anything or say anything about work because you run the risk of putting your job in jeopardy should someone take offense to something you’ve said or done?  This post isn’t that, I promise, but it does have to do with the fact that I have a job and how my current job has changed my home life for the better.  

A little over seven months ago I accepted a new job.  Taking into account my opening paragraph, I won’t talk about where I work or what I do at work except to say what you already know, I’m an administrative assistant.  I do that.  I love my job for lot of reasons, I truly do, but there’s one reason that overshadows all the others.  Since taking this job, I have been able to see my kiddos every morning.  This is something that has really never been possible before, either because of timing or because of distance.  I am absolutely so grateful for the close proximity of my new job and the fact that the time I start allows me to spend a little bit of time with my babies.

In days of yore, I was gone before they woke up.  At work before the sun even considered rising above the horizon.  Now, not only can I get a shower in the morning, I can help wake up my sleepy-headed girl-child.  Maybe help her figure out what to wear; help her get dressed. She requires a very steady hand, a gentle voice and lots of coaxing to rouse her from her slumber.  She does not like to get up and will do everything in her power to delay putting feet to floor.  And even with all the gentle coaxing, tickles, smiles and kisses in the hopes that she’ll smile and wrap her warm little arms around your neck, some days, it doesn’t matter one whit and she’s just gonna be a grump and everything is going to be wrong with her world.

I can talk about stuff with my always-ready-to-go-up-at-the-BCOD boy-child. He tends to be awake already when my alarm goes off and by the time I get out of the shower, he is happy and bouncy and full of it (you know when I mean).  He’s pretty self-sufficient but usually it’s when he’s trying to get dressed that he can’t find a pair of socks or he (in his mind) doesn’t have any clean jeans/t-shirts to wear or can’t find something he needs for school.  He’s kind of scatterbrained in that way, even though he’s so smart it’s scary.  Unfortunately, I think he gets the scatterbrain from his mom.  But he’s the complete and total opposite of his little sister.  She requires finesse.  He doesn’t.

They’re old enough now that they can get their own cereal, pour their own milk, and get their own spoons.  But I get to witness the fact that they’re eating a healthy breakfast.  I can help get them ready for the day.  I can spend time with them.  This is something that I’ve never had before.

Then, when I’ve got my jacket on and I’m pulling my keys out of my purse…all part of my new routine…my kiddos have started a routine, too.  They come away from the table where they’re munching on cereal to hug me – each in turn – and then, when I go into the kitchen to collect my lunch box (hubby packs my lunch, bless him) and kiss hubby on the cheek, I head to the front hallway on my way out of the house and find both kiddos, lined up in front of the door expecting more hugs.  It’s awesome.

Though I’m definitely not a morning person (my girl-child probably gets her intense dislike of mornings from me), I must admit mornings have become my favorite part of the day.

TTFN
JMS

Things that make you go EEEW!

We all have our things – things which might disturb us on a much, much deeper level than the obvious ick factor of said thing.  For example, for me, the word Moist is a serious EEEW!  Yes, we all know what the word means (well…I hope you know what it means) but aside from explaining the general dampness factor…well, actually, that’s kind of EEEW, too.  ((shudder))  OK – moving on.

Then there’s the whole getting-your-mouth-as-close-to-the-water-fountain-spout-as-possible-while-not-actually-touching-it thing.  There are folks who really must believe, in the deepest recesses of their minds, that the closer their mouths are to the spout, the fresher (maybe colder?) the water they’re drinking will be.  Not to mention the germy-er.   I mean, come on!  Have you ever really LOOKED at a water fountain spout while you’re drinking from it?  They’re gross!  Even if they’re cleaned regularly, there’s always some kind of gooey residue around the spigot.  It’s brown, or pink, or sometimes even greenish and I’m sorry, but there’s NO WAY you’re getting me close to that thing.  EEEW!

And ladies, let’s not forget the Fuzzy Bath.  (Guys – feel free to check out for a minute.  You may rejoin the conversation in the next paragraph.)  The Fuzzy Bath happens when a woman gets it into her head that a hot bath, maybe a book, a glass of wine (hm…) and possibly a candle or two is a wonderful idea, and possibly even necessary for survival or sanity.  (We’ve all been there.)  After a good soak, one thinks, Hm…I suppose I should shave my legs.  So, razor and soap (or gel shaving cream, if you prefer) in hand one begins the deforestation process.  After a while, you realize you’re sitting in a soupy miasma of soap or shaving cream residue, plus leg fur.  I’m sorry – I cannot continue.  A shower is then required to not only clean oneself, but also clean out the tub.

There’s also:

·         The Tub-Drain Fur-Ball

·         Vomit (of any kind, human or animal)

·         Breast-fed baby poop (sorry, truth)

·         Poop, in general.  Especially sidewalk poop.  Especially stepped-in sidewalk poop.

·         The Unknown Food Origin (UFO) from the Tupperware container in the fridge that you’re pretty sure was, at one point, solid, yet is now a liquid.  This requires simply throwing out the Tupperware container as it is no longer salvageable. 

·         Snot.  Especially wall-snot.  This occurs when young children dig for gold and then wipe on the nearest vertical surface.  It’s shiny.  Like dried egg yolk or high-gloss paint.

For my son, he says that the word Poop is his EEEW!  He also tacked on his extreme dislike for wet, squishy socks.  My daughter and husband both voted for vomit being their EEEW!  Oh - the list could go on and on.  And now that you're thoroughly grossed out...

TTFN
JMS

What will they think of next?

Someone really needs to explain this to me. Scented Duck Tape? Really? I know I cannot be the only one wondering about this. What would someone use scented Duck Tape for, anyway? In my humble opinion Duct Tape is a gray/silver color and is used to fix things that are moving when they shouldn't. Conversely, WD40 is used to make things move that aren't moving. See? That's simple logic. Therefore, (and again, in my humble opinion,) scented Duct Tape is useless.

Plus, can you imagine getting caught sniffing the bubble gum scented Duct Tape you're using to hold your car together? Seriously. What would you say? That's gotta be all kinds of embarrassing.

TTFN

JMS

The moment is broken

That moment when your kids have done something not so awesome and they need to be scolded but not so bad that they deserve grounding or time in their room so you give them your most withering mom look and they’re looking back at you like whatever mom I’ve so got your number and you keep glaring at them thinking that if you keep it up they’ll finally learn the silent but necessary lesson you’re trying so desperately to teach and then they grin at you or roll their eyes at you and you try to school your features so you don’t betray this serious lesson by smiling but eventually you’re scrunching up your face and bursting out with laughter because those frustrating kids of yours are kind of cute and you love them you just can’t stand it anymore and the moment is broken.

 

Or when you’re in bed at night totally engrossed in a book and Hubby comes in and stands at the bottom of the bed and you can see him just beyond the top of your book so you know he’s there but you’re not really paying attention and then he hikes his pajama bottoms up to his armpits and stands there waiting for you to realize that he’s being a goofball trying to draw you away from your book and you know exactly what he’s doing but you try to ignore him except you keep reading the same sentence over and over again and finally you look up thinking you’ll be able to keep a straight face but you come eye to eye with the man you married who has his pajama bottoms pulled up to his armpits and he grins and you burst out laughing because you just can’t stand it anymore and the moment is broken.

 

I know you know what I’m talking about.  

TTFN

JMS