Monday, February 23, 2009

Randomness Revisited - Hubby's Mom & Kiddo Scuffle

It's funny how you can have so many things to write about but not be able to come up with something you feel is post-worthy. Aside from a rather uneventful weekend, and a huge "scuffle" with Kiddo, and Hubby's trip north to visit his mom in the hospital, and church on Sunday, and housework, and coloring my hair and...and...and... We don't really know much about Hubby's mom except that as of this writing, she still has not had surgery. I'm guessing there's a law-suit pending, but nothing has been discussed yet. We're still saying fervent prayers that she comes through surgery with flying colors, that her pain is minimal, and that her recovery and rehab are swift. This poor woman really doesn't need anything else to deal with in the "health" department; she's already been through so much! If you're saying prayers for GM, please continue - she needs all the help she can get! The "scuffle" with Kiddo was over the fact that he flatly refused to clean his room on Saturday. Hubby told him, before he left for work that morning, that he expected Kiddo to pick up the stuff all over his room by the time Hubby got back that evening. Kiddo did everything but clean his room and no amount of threatening seemed to make any difference. Hours later, I finally set the kitchen timer for 1 hour and told Kiddo that if the timer went off and he hadn't made significant progress picking up his room, I was coming in with a big black trash bag and everything that was on the floor was going in the trash. He screamed, he cried, he fought - but he did not clean. When the timer went off, I stopped what I was doing and marched in his room with a trash bag and started putting his things in it. More screaming ensued, but I was not swayed. I felt like the meanest Mommy in the world, but I felt that if I didn't follow-through with my threat that Kiddo would never believe any future threats. I don't see that I really did anything wrong by doing this, though. It's a lesson for him that I hope he takes with him for the rest of his life. While I was silently and methodically stuffing things in the trash bags (I used 3!!!) he screamed and cried and kicked and screamed some more... I finally said, calmly and with much feeling, "Buddy, the next time Mommy or Daddy ask you to do something, what are you going to do?" "Do it," he says, teary-eyed and sniffling. "And do you believe me now when I say I'm coming in here with trash bags and throwing everything away?" "Yes ma'am," says he. "Well, I hope you've learned something today," I tell him. The biggest screams and sobs came when I picked up his Sea Monkey aquarium thing. He really thought I was going to flush them or something, but I simply put them on the dresser in my room and told him he couldn't have them any more - that they were my pets now and I would take care of them. I felt awful, but at the same time, I felt justified. He needs to learn this lesson early. And just for the record, I did not actually throw his stuff away and he can earn his things back, but for now - everything is in the attic. TTFN JMS

4 comments:

overtly trite said...

remember this happening when I was a kid! haven't had to do it with ours-yet anyway

Archeobot said...

I'm glad you were tough. You need to be, when they don't learn there are consequences in life early there is always trouble later. Believe me I deal with teenagers every day! I may not be a parent, but I know it was hard to do it! I know you would never throw his stuff out, but I'm glad you are making him earn it back. Don't feel too bad my dear.

Kathy McG said...

Jen,
I did the same thing to my daughter when she was about the same age as Kiddo, and I even went through taking the bag to the dumpster. I was going back later to get it. Much to my chagrin, the garbage men came before I had the chance, and they crushed her toys before I could stop them!
Now, she is 32, and when she sees a toy like one in the dumpster, she never fails to say, "I used to have one of those, but my mom let the garbage men grind mine up!"
It still taught her a lesson though. After that incident, she cleaned her toys up when I asked her to.
Hugs,
Kathy

Anonymous said...

You done good! Otherwise, who knows what he might turn out to be like.

I'll do my term paper later!

I'll pick up my kids from scouts later.

I'll pay my taxes later... Wait a min ...he could turn into Tom Daschle!

Love, UB