Thursday, January 29, 2015

You ain’t got nothing on me!

Move over Red Bull.  Take a hike Five Hour Energy.

One of the most important parts of my morning routine is…of course…coffee.  First, I pick up my mug.  Then, I take a trip down the hall to the break room to wash out said mug.  Then, I stride with purpose back down the hall to my office and proceed to select one lucky K-cup from the spinny-thing on the coffee bar.  I open the maw of King Keurig, pop in the proffered offering, and pierce it through with joyful anticipation bordering on glee.  I usually yawn once or twice, just for good measure, while I wait for King Keurig to spew forth its beautiful, lava-esque liquid.  Strong Coffee, Ultra-Strong Coffee, and Holy-Crap-That’s-Bracing-GASP-Just-Let-Me-Catch-My-Breath-And-Wipe-My-Eyes-Before-You-Try-To-Talk-To-Me-Coffee.  Yeah.  That’s the stuff.

Cream? Nope.  Sugar?  Definitely not.  Why ruin a good thing?

Oh Jen…why?

Because Death Wish Coffee – that’s why.  The most beautiful sacrifice King Keurig has ever, or will ever, touch.  It slices, it dices, it kick’s sleep’s ass.  It’s the best thing since sliced bread.

Wait!  Seriously?  Death Wish Coffee?  You’re kidding, right?  I sincerely hope you’re kidding!

Nope.  It’s awesome.  You, oh coffee-lover extraordinaire, must get some.  Take it from me (in this totally unsolicited, absolutely from-the-heart, truest form of flattery “advertisement” for the brown grounds that are made of awesome) if you truly love coffee in its purest form this is the caffeinated beverage you’ve been dreaming about all your life.

Don’t believe me?  Go to for proof. 


1 comment:

Elizabeth Haren said...

Death Wish Coffee... very definitely the most glorious substance on earth. And Valhalla Java ain't bad either (made by the same company). It sings the song of my soul. Caffeine fuels my life.
;) Tananda